Crash Bang Wallop...

Our Genial shaved ape Mester Berty Trousers has taken his love of beats and breaks to a whole new level! Oh yes, in a cunning experiment Mr T took to the roads of Britain last week with a mandate to create himself a new genre of music using just his body. He began by downing a number of alcoholic beverages at the local hostelry and then with the rebellious abandon of a true artist he jumped on his self –propelling bicycle and headed out on the highways of Cardiff. It was not long before the muse took him and with one swift move he slammed his head onto the road, followed closely by the rest of his body. And there it was! The new sounds he had been searching for! The ‘THWACK’ of the head on concrete! The ‘SNAP’ of his leg as the bone snapped in two! Unfortunately, due to the sheer amount of cheap booze coursing through his fur-lined veins poor Berty had forgotten to record the sounds his body made as he bounced and squelched along the tarmac, making the whole exercise redundant.

Of course, there are some cruel souls who say that Bert was merely pissed up and fell off his bike breaking his leg in the process, but we here at BC Towers throw our weight behind our beat maestro and totally believe that it all happened in the name of tune-smitherey!.....

In fact so impressed were we by this experiment that we have decided to open up the idea, to you our beloved listeners! In honour of Bertie’s Kamikaze-like approach to new music we want you to sample your pain! All you have to do is make a short recording (preferably MP3) of you hurting yourself and we will include it somewhere in a brand new tune! It could be a simple scream of pain from catching your finger in a door, or it could be the howl of misery that comes just after your best mate has booted you square in the nuts. Whatever it is we want to hear it! Simply send an email to us via the website with your yelp of agony attached and we’ll mix it into a brand new tune! It really couldn’t be simpler! All noises will be listened to and verified by a panel of people who happen to posses ears. The sender-innner of the best noise will not only win a BC T-Shirt but will also get a free jar of Mama Bomb Culture’s Pickled Onions of Love and Destiny (You will have to come to the gig to pick these up though, as they’re not really suitable for posting).

Anyhoooooooooooo……The upshot of Bert’s *bravely artistic / stupidly drunk* (Delete where applicable) experiment has meant BC are out of action for the next 2 months and so the planned upcoming shows have had to be postponed. On the upside though it does mean that work on the long awaited Bomb Culture Long-playing CD will be pushed forward.... So you what you lose from BC playing live, you gain with a shot of pure recorded pleasure. Just as BC taketh away-eth, BC also giveth – Ain’t we nice?
Get those wince-inducing sounds of ouch-iness rolling in folks!

Bomb Culture – Accepting no liability for anyone deliberatley twatting themselves to get their howls of pain included in a toon.